It has been a bit since I updated the blog. The main reason is, this round of chemo kicked my butt. A week and a half ago I went in for round three of four. I was feeling pretty well and optimistic that I was halfway done with the “yucky chemo”. The infusion, as always, went fine. My labs all looked decent, but I was starting this round with the lowest starting white blood count when compared to rounds one and two. I was starting at around 6.5. While this is considered normal, round one was a 7 and round two a 13 so I wasn’t sure if that would affect anything. After the infusion, I went home and just laid around the rest of the day. Unlike most, I am always very tired on the day of infusion. Most are not because as part of the pre-need protocol you are giving a heavy steroid which keeps most up the night of treatment. Not this girl!
I slept off and on treatment day and went to bed shortly after Eli that evening. He goes down like clockwork around 8:00 every evening. Like me, he loves his sleep. The next two or three days I don’t remember much. I slept….a lot. If I had to guess, it was an average of 20 hours a day. I can vaguely remember talking to the kids and Chris. I remember him talking to me and feeling like my eyes were rolling back in my head. I just could not stay awake.
Once I started to be up a bit more I was more nauseous than I have been. I had to take medicine four or five times and didn’t even do that with rounds one and two combined. Like the previous times, I lost my taste and had the weird metallic all smell, but it seemed a bit more intense. Nothing at all tasted good to eat. I’m fairly certain I skipped several meals that first week from either sleeping through them or just not being able to eat due to lack of taste. My go-to items seem to be shakes from Sonic and peanuts butter. Not the healthiest of options, but I am working hard to stay hydrated with water and Gatorade and get calories in how I can, when I can.
I believe it was Monday I started feeling a bit better. I was still very tired, but able to stay up most of the day. Then the next symptom hit. Insomnia. I had this in round two as well. I went several nights, I believe two, where I didn’t sleep at all. I then would have to compensate by sleeping during the day. It’s frustrating but manageable. A lot of people do that when they work overnight shifts. During the nights I would binge-watch shows and play games on my iPad. I wanted to do things around the house, but wanting and doing are completely separate things.
Today I feel human. I finally got my body back on the normal day/night schedule and have slept well the last two or three nights. I woke up when Eli did, at 6:00 am….yes, on a Saturday. We cuddled in bed for a bit and have been going strong since. I plan to cook some dinner this evening for the family, work on the mountain of laundry that has piled up, and have already placed the weekly grocery order. I will try to make the best of this time before round four takes me back down again.
Round four was scheduled to occur on Tuesday. I wasn’t thrilled with this because that meant I would sleep through Thanksgiving and when I was awake not be able to taste any of the yummy food. We have some sweet friends who invited us over for dinner and promised to handle everything so I didn’t have to…I want so bad to be able to enjoy that time with family and our adopted family. On Thursday of last week, I got a call that there was a scheduling conflict and they would need to change my chemo date. She said she could get me in late Wednesday or would have to push me to the week after Thanksgiving. After discussing my options with her, it was best that we push it until after the Holiday. I will be having my fourth and final AC chemo treatment on December 1. I will get to enjoy the week with Chris, who is off work, and all three of my boys! I will get to taste Thanksgiving….and for a few moments forget that I have cancer. For that I am grateful!
We are bummed that we can’t do our normal Thanksgiving trip to Arkansas, but with COVID, it’s just not safe for me, really, any of us. I’m not scared of COVID, but it’s real and for someone in such a vulnerable state, it is wise we hide out here and spend time with only those we are close to here. In the short-term it stinks, but when we must focus on still being around next year and for many years to come!
Jordan will be coming home soon and will be with us through the new year and we are thrilled to have him home! The next month is sure to be exciting. Yes, there will be ups and downs, but we plan to focus entirely on the ups!!!
If I don’t get another blog up before Thursday, Happy Thanksgiving. I challenge you to look at your lives and examine how God has blessed you in 2020. There is joy in every situation. Even in 2020. Even during a global pandemic or a cancer diagnosis, God is blessing us. How has He blessed you?