I am sitting here in the waiting room about to have treatment 20. It has gone so fast! Nine to fo counting today!

When I started radiation they told me that the only major side effects was fatigue. For the first 15 or so treatments I felt nothing. I kept thinking, this is odd to have so much energy. I haven’t felt this good since well before diagnosis. I thought I was going to skate through this with no side effects.

Then it hit. We had a busy weekend and I thought I was just tired because of that. Yesterday I was tired. Tired to the point I couldn’t keep my eyes open. My anxiety was elevated and I just don’t feel right. I worked both jobs yesterday and on the way home from the church I told Chris I needed to rest before making dinner. I dozed off on the couch for about an hour and ended up ordering take out. Just didn’t feel like cooking!

Today, so far, is much the same. I woke up feeling just as tired, of not more, as I did when I went to bed. My anxiety is still up there and for no reason. I’ve been taking my medicine for anxiety the same for years and it helps. Not yesterday and today! I have found myself trying to make excuses to not have treatment. I tried several times to get out of my appointment yesterday and I’m fighting the urge to go to the car right now. They are running 30 minutes behind and I don’t want to wait. I want to go home and go to bed!

I feel grateful that I made it nearly a month into this treatment before feeling anything, but now I have to figure out how to work naps into our busy routine!